By Teniola Adedokun
Conductor: Aunty, I no fit give you change, see as you Yellow.
Me: Oga, please my change abeg! I’m getting off at the next bus stop.
Conductor: No replies
The bus comes to a halt. I get off the bus and ask the conductor again for my change (sorry #300 is not beans, recession hit me too)
Conductor: You still dey ask for change. I no get. (Proceeds to call more passengers)
Me: Oga, my change. Driver, tell your guy to give me my change.
Others join in and tell him to do so. After a while, he obliges, hands me my change and the conversation goes thus,
Conductor: As you Yellow reach, you still wan collect change. No be your fault. Ashewo (shouts) She don bleach her body finish. She no even get. You no fine. Ashewo.
This is just one of the various sceneries that can occur when you are yellow and a girl in Nigeria. I’m not even going to go into the talk of gender blah blah blah right because that is a story for another day. Females in Nigeria, we’ve literally suffered. I’ve been in situations where I was put down as a result of being a girl. But before I digress.
Why does the average Nigerian think that the fair ones have better lives? Or let me rephrase it, they must be omo baba olowo hence the fair skin which might not even be in anyway fresh. Take me for example, the acne I have, only God can cure.
Update – She doesn’t have acne anymore. Praise the lord!
Some of us are freaking broke, you get my point. I mean, why would I be taking bus if I was so comfortable???
Then again, the talk on bleaching. Is it every fair person that bleached? Were you there when they bleached? Is it your own bleaching even if they bleached? Some of us were put in our mothers’ wombs naturally bleached. In fact, right now in our adult stages, we are ten shades darker. After walking the hot suns of Nigeria for majority of my life. Let’s not forget I can’t maintain because Elizabeth Harden etc are too expensive for me so I feel like a blended dark skin woman with stories to tell on my skin.
Ashewo, ashewo, where’s your sugar daddy?
Oga oh. So because God created me yellow. I must have a sugar daddy ehnn. Senifi! This is a constant line of insult. Just get into an argument. Say no to that boy. Even in the dms, commentsection, real life situations etc. As a yellow girl, there must be a sugar daddy that is sponsing her lifestyle. You are quick to hear real life situational opinions of yourself even when you don’t step out of the house.
Gbeborun 1: Do you know yellow?
Gbeborun 2: Yeah. That girl, she has airs about her, she’s so proud.
(Let’s not forget that she doesn’t know me, has had no encounter with me)
Gbeborun 1: I heard (Emphasis on heard) that she was carrying Aristo
Gbeborun 2: Of course, it’s true. I even heard she bleached her skin.
(Haba, kilode, why?)
Did I forget the guys? We’ve moved past those ones that you didn’t answer oh. I’m sure you heard yellow people are treated differently. I’m sure if yellow pawpaws here start their epistles of broken relationships, the floor won’t handle it. What about the guys that assume their yellow girlfriends must be cheating on them? Or the ones whose mothers didn’t raise them well?
It’s no different in the market, even.
Aunty come and buy, dragging from all corners.
Or the igbo story which actually has some benefits to be honest. For one, Igbo people give me more food. Or the girl at the bank who insisted I had Igbo blood. Must I have Igbo blood? Can’t I be a Nigerian as anyone else?